♈ ANONYMOUS - 1

[fleetnpcs]

Oh, gr3at, looks lik3 this thing has finally d3cid3d to work. W3'v3 sp3nt millions and millions of y3ars taking ov3r th3 3ntir3 galaxy and 3uilding spac3ships, 3ut w3 can't mak3 a husktop work without full 3att3ry charg3? 3ogus, man.

3ut, right, not h3r3 to complain a3out my husktop. Gotta stay on track, 33for3 it d3cid3s to go and k33l ov3r on m3 again.

So, a littl3 3irdy told m3 that this 3oard is a r3gular circl3j3rk of psionics, and I just got an Imp3rial droid-scr33d d3liv3r3d last night. Lucky m3, right? Psionic 3as3lin3 t3sting, two p3rig33s, 33 th3r3 or 33 cull3d and hav3 your 3rain us3d for a 3att3ry, 3luh 3luh 3luh.

I'm not h3r3 to whin3 a3out how th3 fudg3 I can g3t around this, though don't g3t m3 wrong, if you'v3 got any 3xciting s3cr3ts that ar3n't turning up on troogle, you 33tt3r shar3.

3ut, uh. Is th3r3 anyway to g3t around it? 33caus3 I alr3ady pilot a psirunn3r, and, lik3, not looking forward to th3 mandatory upgrad3s.

-MM

Comments

[fleetnpcs]

Holy shit, why ar3 you always talking about my horns? Starting to g3t a littl3 fr3ak3d out h3r3.

[refiningspacetime]

| Please | Don't Flatter Yourself Unneccessarily | =:I |

| Psionics are Transmitted Through One's Horns | Thus | If You Dock Them |

| | | | | ! | ! | ! |

| Your Test Scores will Hardly be Very High | Will They | ? |

[fleetnpcs]

Y3ah, okay, I s33 what you'r3 saying, but it's still crazy as shit.

If I cut off my horns, th3y'r3 going to cull m3 for infirmary, b3caus3 I won't b3 abl3 to walk.

[refiningspacetime]

| Nonsense | How Long are They | ? |

| And to Stop You from Making Any More Terrible Jokes -| No | I am Not Asking for Any Reasons Other than the Obvious |

[fleetnpcs]

W3ll, shit, thanks for cl3aring that up.

I don't know. I hav3n't 3xactly sat down and m3asur3d th3m sinc3 th3y'v3 grown in. Th3y'r3.. t3n inch3s, mayb3 tw3lv3. Not th3 bigg3st s3t, but I'm always using my pan, so th3y'r3 kinda n3cc3ssary for staying upright.

[refiningspacetime]

| Mm | You'll Get Used to It | Initially It's Disorienting | But | It only Takes a Week or So of Stumbling into Walls | And then You'll be Over It | =:B |

| Mine were Thirty One Inches when I Docked Them | I am not a Kineticist | My Ability is Entirely Mobility-Based | So My Sense of Environmental Awareness was Completely Shot at First | But I Learned to Compensate | And got Used To It Within the Perigee |

| And Luckily | You'll have Two Perigees To Adapt |

[fleetnpcs]

Okay, wait, l3t's back this up. I hav3 SO MANY QU3STIONS.

You had a 31 inch rack and you chopp3d it off? WHY?

Did th3y grow back?

If not: is THAT why you hav3 this w3ird horn f3tish thing going on now?

Is that why you want m3 to cut off min3? B3caus3 now you'r3 lik3, d3sp3rat3ly r3gr3tful of your crazy rack-lopping d3cision and you want 3v3ryon3 3ls3 to copy you and validat3 it?

Oh, y3ah. Did you k33p th3 horns? And if y3s, can I hav3 th3m?

B3caus3 holy shit, I could mak3 prosth3tics out of thos3 things and hav3 p3opl3 swooning.

[refiningspacetime]

| Wow | What Thoughtful Questions |

| Let's See |

| Yes | Yes | and Then I Cut Them Off Again | =:| |

| No | I am Merely Suggesting It because I would Hope Sufficiently Dampen Your Psionics | Or at least Loose Your Control | to the Degree that They May Not Find You Quite as Appealing as a Helms Candidate |

| It's Unlikely to Work | of course | Ninety Percent of Maroons who Are Tested Will be Placed in a Helm | Regardless of Their Actual Scores | But It is an Option There if You Would Like to Try It |

| And | For the Rest |
| Yes | And | If You Pay Me | Sure | Why Not | You Weirdo |

[fleetnpcs]

Okay, that's an awful lot of hop3s and mayb3s and g3n3ral ambival3nc3. You'r3 saying cut off my rack in th3 hop3 that it'll fuck up my psionics 3nough it do3sn't show up on th3 3xam?

What, is that lik3, why you cut off yours? B3caus3 I'm thinking th3y might just s33 m3 with nubs and cull m3 for fucking up that bad.

And -
S3riously? And th3y'r3 31 inch3s? How much do you want?

[refiningspacetime]

| Yes | That is What I'm Getting At |

| No | I've Accepted that What Happens will Happen | I Cut Them for Different Reasons |

| Mm | No | They're 27 inches | I didn't Cut into the Quick | That would have been Excessively Foolish |

| And | 500 Caegars |

[fleetnpcs]

I think I'll pass, thanks.

Oh, haha, v3ry funny. Sorry, I'm not on3 of thos3 rusts with a rich h3art. How about 200 ca3gars?

[refiningspacetime]

| Mm | How about No | ? |
| If you Reread | My Initial Price was a Statement | One Which Lacked any Question Noodle which Could Imply that It was Open to Haggling | =:I |

| I'll have You Know that 500 Caegars is a Very Acceptable Price | That's 18 Caegars per Inch |

[fleetnpcs]

You driv3 a hard bargain.

C'mon, you'r3 not 3v3n using th3m. How longs your rack now? Th3y'r3 probably lik3, shit, 80 inch3s by now, you don't n33d 28 or 31 or what3v3r just hanging around lik3 loos3 ca3gars.

[refiningspacetime]

| I don't Know | I Don't Measure Them | =:| |
| 18 Inches | ? |

[refiningspacetime]

| Wait |
| Are We Talking about the Top Set or the Bottom Set | ? |

[fleetnpcs]

Wait, holy shit, you hav3 two s3ts? And th3y'r3 both long 3nough you fudging cut th3m?

And you'r3 still trying to mak3 m3 pay 500 for th3m? Man. That's just hat3ful.

[refiningspacetime]

| And Honestly | Horn Cutting is a Very Easy Task |
| I don't know Why All of You are so Squeamish About It |

[postalprestidigitation]

( - HeY + HeY BoO + I HaVe tRoLl hOrNs tOo + yOu wAnT SoMe + *0v0* - )

[activatingaggro]

dude, no, dont hawk yrn weirnd shit on herne. make a new post. >:O

[fleetnpcs]

Y3ah, okay, I'm kind of g3tting w3ird3d out.

How do you hav3 troll horns, as in, multipl3? You robbing th3 cullpits, or ar3 you just on3 of thos3 fr3aky kids with multipl3 s3ts?

[postalprestidigitation]

( - LoL WtF + HoW DiD YoU CuT YoUr hOrNs oFf + *0o0* - )

[refiningspacetime]

| I Paid Someone to Do It | It's not Exactly Something You can Do Yourself |

[postalprestidigitation]

( - NeAt + dId iT BlEeD + *0V0* - )

[refiningspacetime]

| Ahh | Only a Little | He was Fairly Good at His Job | For Someone Operating a Motorised Saw |

| Mostly the Velvet is What Bleeds | That | And the Quick | If You cut too Close to the Fleshy Bits |

| Why | ? | Are You considering Doing It | ? |

[activatingaggro]

lets hope he was fucking good at it w/ how much we had to pay him. >:{